I don't think I've actually heard a song on the radio in the last 2 weeks, especially when I'm driving by myself. If I hear a cough, I focus in to make sure she's not choking. If she squeaks (which she does frequently...), I freak out thinking she can't breathe. Just last week actually, Michael and I were on our way to get our taxes done. Julia coughed and squeaked a couple of times, and Michael was like Superman getting into the back seat to check on her. I don't think I've ever seen him move so fast. Of course, she was fine...but still!
I am so aware of what other drivers are doing now too. Checking my mirrors a lot more frequently, making sure people behind me are slowing down or stopping fast enough. I watch intersections for as long as I can before going through them...I watch oncoming traffic to make sure that someone doesn't cross the center line towards me. Rarely do I feel "safe" anymore when driving with my little girl in the back seat.
I can't even count how many times I have to remind myself to eat during the day. I'm trying to keep my calorie and fluid intake up so that she can eat, but it's really a challenge sometimes! Even getting a shower is a challenge too. I'm working on it though. It kind of blends in with the whole being paranoid thing. If I'm in the shower, and she's in her bassinet, I might not hear her if she starts to choke or something. *Sigh*
Either way...I wouldn't give it up. It's hard. It's stressful. It's trying. It's wonderful.